Working 6 days a week, 10 to 12-hour days, and working through lunch have left both my husband and myself exhausted and somewhat absent from our personal lives. But we're working toward our goals. First, to finish paying for the wedding and eventually buy a new (well, slightly used) car. We'd also like to make sure we're comfortable enough to be able to start a family. But at the rate we're going, will a family even be possible?
Will our family be able to work when Mom gets home at 8pm, irritable because she didn't get to go to the gym that day, and forced to pack making dinner and chores into 2 hours? Will our family be happy when Daddy gets home at 9pm after being elbow-deep in an engine all evening? Exhausted and filthy he has to eat quickly in order to shower and be in bed by 11pm, only to wake up and do it all over again the next day.
That doesn't sound like a happy or healthy family life to me.
So what do we do to change it?
There's been a lot of talk recently about having a baby. We bring it up, our friends and family bring it up...and it's something we desperately want. Still, I can't see myself having a child and working the way we do now. How do others handle it? Sure, I could work less, perform worse at my job, make less money, and be home more. But how does that benefit us financially? If I result to that is raising a family even something we can afford?
But we love our jobs, and we're thankful for the opportunity to succeed! We both recently have been presented with some very good opportunities. Which is why we don't want to give it up. Rather, I'd like to find a way to make it all work. Can we have it all?
I'm really just venting here. I guess I'm using this blog more as a journal. I know it won't give me any divine solutions. It won't magically pay me more so I can work less. But it will allow me to get some things off of my chest on my Sunday morning off, while having coffee on my back patio. This is my first step to a work-life balance.
It's a good first step :). I honestly don't know if I believe anymore that someone can really have it all. However, that depends on your perception of having it all. In order to have a healthy and happy family you will need to spend more hours at home and less at work, that's a given. But does that have to mean you are less successful? Is it possible for you and "daddy" (lol) to be more efficient with the time you spend at work, ie get the same amount or more done in less hours? You may think not, but once you have a child you'd be suprised at how you can increase your efficiency, and where you can find more time and energy. I've heard it said many times, and it's very true: "If everyone waited until they were ready to have children, no one ever would, and the human race would have ended long ago."
ReplyDeleteYou and Doug are more blessed than many people I know, just decide What you want and decide that you Will have it, and you will. It's worked for you so far hasn't it? ;)
I love and miss you both. I have some sort of news, call me when you have the time. Lol.
Its a matter of what you want more, I know first hand, time can be managed and a family can be started on a less than generous monthly income. Some of my happiest memories were when Daddy and I had less money but we had our beautiful children a cozy home and lots of love. The simple things were what was the most important. My children did not lack for clothes,(all tho they may have been second hand) or toys ( the same) We were creative and crafty in creating a beautiful home with a yard for playing, you were taken , horse back riding, given dance classes, instrument lessons, and I even found time to run at least 5 miles a day. What I am trying to say is not every thing can be planned perfectly, what will be, will be, relax and breath. As long as Mommy and Daddy love each other children will be happy as well.
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